


blunt stings to feather-light touches

by stellaine



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alcohol, Birthday, Confessions, Getting Together, M/M, competitive drunk people playing spin the bottle, for Akaashi's birthday!!, idiots getting drunk, no beta we die like men, why are they so oblivious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:21:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27919654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellaine/pseuds/stellaine
Summary: Keiji claims that this is the worst birthday he's had in his whole life. Or not.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Comments: 6
Kudos: 47





	blunt stings to feather-light touches

**Author's Note:**

> hello! my dumb ass forgot that it is actually december and that it's deadly cold in japan when it's december and that you can't celebrate a birthday on a rooftop when it's deadly cold. brain just shuts down when writing, it literally forgets anything else... but yeah, until i edit this to a more decent-er look, i present to you, akaashi bday fic!! it's 28 hours late but in my defense, school is my mortal enemy. feel free to imagine this in a tropical japan... (or no, that's not a good idea either... i really just need to edit it huh...) enjoy!!

This is the worst birthday ever.

That sentence repeats like an annoying mantra that Keiji doesn't want to hear but is forced to listen to anyway. He doesn't want it in his head but he thinks about how to get rid of it anyway. He doesn't want to see Koutarou, but across the low table filled with salty-sour umami dishes, alcohol and a blown petite cake, surrounded by an environment of his former classmates and old friends jeering and having fun in the background, and under the wondrous view of the stars, he sees the athlete grinning like an idiot anyway.

Keiji's smile is genuine yet composed, the type of smile that is trying to hold something back. He's thankful for his friends, for this simple surprise celebration, no extravagant formalities and just quickly getting to the fun part. He adores the food Osamu brought along with the help of his twin, and how Shouyou, Kenma, Atsumu get on each other's nerves in the card game they're playing. How Konoha and Yukie banter with their former classmates as they grilled meat together, and how his old volleyball friends in high school make a wild din as they drink. It almost feels like a small Tokyo training camp gathering, just without the training and the camping and Tokyo. Only the current life and the new friends made along the way.

And there he is, gripping a glass of beer as he tries to shove the overwhelming emotions into a locker. But he can't. Because the cause of this brewing madness is right in front of him, oblivious to his silent ordeal.

He chugs the beer down to a half, leaving a faint trace of white on his snout. A loud gasp escapes his mouth as he places the glass back.

"Oooh, you're drinking real good, Kaashi!" Koutarou notices him.

Not to sound ungrateful, but this really is the worst birthday ever for him. He's not angry at Koutarou, no. He's not angry at the surprise. He's not angry at the massive amount of people that came. He's angry at himself, because this day is supposed to be for him, but he's been dedicating his mental power to fight his own mind.

If only Koutarou wasn't there. But frankly, he would be sadder if that happened.

Back to what's in front of him. Tetsurou crams a piece of meat in his mouth, and sings a happy melody. "How did you even get such good food, Bokuto...?" It's like he suddenly wants to cry then and there.

"Well, connections help a lot! Osamu making onigiri was one thing, but making dishes like this? A whole new level," Koutarou gulps down his own piece. "Tsumtsum referred him to me."

"How did you even invite all of them?!"

"Good thing it's Saturday, right? Most of them were able to come!"

When Tetsurou said "all of them", he wasn't exaggerating. Keiji's Fukurodani volleyball team friends, some of the members from MSBY and Adlers, Karasuno alumni that are buddies with Shouyou and Tobio – just to name a few. It was a legitimately big party, but it was a simple one due to the fact that they're all just playing and drinking and eating. It's good that Koutarou is the one who arranged the party, they didn't have to rent a place when the MSBY apartment had a spacious rooftop.

They hear a low chuckle from Kei. "I can't believe we all meet like this again. I thought Akaashi-san was the one who exerted more thoughtful efforts. What happened, Bokuto-san?"

"What does that even mean, Tsukki?! I'm not allowed to surprise my best friend like this?!" Kuroo guffaws at his words. Keiji, on the hand, felt the need to conjure at least a small laugh. Best friend, huh? Like rose thorns on skin.

"Ahhh. This is a nice spot though. Far enough from the chaos, nearer to the stars. It's kinda nostalgic actually. I remember when Tsukki still treated volleyball as just a club. Look at where he is now," Tetsuro snickers while Kei deadpanned at him.

"I shouldn't have asked you guys that question…" Koutarou only laughs heartily.

"Well, if you didn't, would you realize your love for volleyball sooner?" Keiji props his head with his arm, looking at the blonde.

"Hmm, I think I loved the sport even when I was a kid. Circumstances just made me neutral about it. But yeah, okay, I'll give credit to you guys. Especially since it's Akaashi-san's birthday."

"Whaaat? So you won't credit us on normal days?" Koutarou complains.

"What the heck, Bo." The four of them laugh with his remark.

When Keiji finishes his glass, Koutarou exclaims in awe. "You want more, Keiji?"

His voice with his own name rings in his ears and stays there. "Yes, Bokuto-san."

"That's the spirit!"

Koutarou fills his glass to the brim. It's like he wants Keiji to be drunk. But Keiji knows that's not really the case, even if he wanted it to be. That's why he makes it his mini goal to at least be tipsy tonight, because believe it or not, he has a high tolerance in alcohol, and he knows it.

"Let's play a game," he blurts out without thinking. Maybe the alcohol was starting to affect him after all.

"Oh! That's new, Keiji!" Koutarou points out.

Kei grins like he knows something. Well, he does, actually. "How unlikely. What kind of game?"

"We do the typical spin the bottle. But the questions can only be answered by yes or no. And to answer yes, we need to drink beer. To answer no, we don't."

"Oooooh, I like the rules! Makes you wanna ask unwanted questions because you don't need to explain," Tetsurou says.

With a brash exhale to wake himself up, Keiji takes a bottle while the three place the other empty dishes aside.

"Okay, we're gonna spin one for the person who's gonna ask, and one for who's gonna answer. Since it's just four of us here," Tetsurou adds.

The bottle clinks against the table, and before spinning it, Keiji takes a glance at them. "Bring out your worst," he instructs. But it sounded more like a challenge.

"Oh, you don't need to tell us," Kei tells him like a taunt.

Keiji spins the bottle. The first stop is on Kei, the second is on Koutarou. Tetsurou jeers at them while Keiji only giggles. "Give him a good one, Bo!"

"Hmm." Even when thinking, Koutarou still acts animatedly. Keiji adores him for a moment before another dismissive thought swats it away.

"Have you tasted your booger before?"

Tetsurou chokes on his drink and coughs. Or is he laughing? This is the second time Kei glares at someone and Koutarou roars with laughter. "I was kidding! Here's a question: do you have anyone here, on this rooftop, that you like?"

"Now that's a question…" Keiji whispers unknowingly. With that, they finally see the blush on the blonde's face. They know for sure that it's not because of the drinks. Kei clears his throat and takes a lumpy gulp from his glass, in which it makes the two best friends hoot at him with delight. Keiji only stares with amusement.

"You not commenting is more embarrassing, Akaashi-san," Kei tells him after.

Keiji answers with a chuckle. "It's not everyday you get to see the esteemed, composed Kei Tsukishima turn tomato red."

"Yeah, you looked like Rudolph the Reindeer but it's not just your nose that's red!" Koutarou exclaims, his remark making Tetsurou palm his face.

"Anyway, so who's the lucky person?" Tetsurou prods.

"I thought we're just gonna answer yes or no questions." Kei raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, no follow-ups." Keiji has to support Kei or Koutarou, too, will ask more questions if he allows it. Of course he doesn't want to lose a friend on his birthday.

"Ehh, no fun!" the Nekoma alumnus complained.

"Next!" Keiji ignores him and proceeds to spin the bottle. First stop at Tetsurou, second stop at him. The man smiles at him knowingly, but this doesn't faze him one bit. For his demeanor at least. He can already hear his heartbeat and Tetsurou hasn't even asked a question.

"Okay! What kind of question do you want, Akaashi? I'll make it easy for you to answer since it's your birthday." But he doesn't want this either. Maybe it's because of the alcohol, but he's ready to answer anything even if it's about Koutarou.

"Give me what you have in mind."

"Oya." Tetsurou's look is mischievous; Keiji still hopes it's not about Koutarou.

"Is there anyone you want to kiss right now that's in this party?"

"Oooooh!!" Keiji hears Koutarou exclaim.

It's as if his heart stopped. It's not like Tetsurou revealed him or anything, but just to imagine kissing the person he likes while being under the influence of alcohol is a strange experience. It's like he's not allowed to think like that at this moment, but at the same time, he can do it if he's dared enough. Keiji releases a suppressed sigh, holds his glass, and downs his drink without leaving a trace.

"Wooow, you drink so well, Keiji!! Has Tenma-san been drinking with you?" Koutarou says as he refills Keiji's glass. Tetsurou, on the other hand, chortles on his own because he finally made fun of him. "I'd really wanna know who you wanna kiss though. So I could tease them with you!"

"Good thing you're not allowed to, Bokuto-san."

"Agh, no fair!"

The Nekoma alumnus laughs boisterously. He's quick to figure out things. That's why ever since he learned about Keiji's years of pining for his best friend, he's never stopped teasing. Kei only drinks his beer, his face in a question. Maybe he has caught on, too, that Tetsurou knows something. Keiji can't be bothered.

"Next one!" Tetsurou starts without waiting for Keiji to recover. He spins it; the first stop on Koutarou.

The second stop on Keiji.

He just wants to pass out on the cold floor right there. Why did Tenma ever build his tolerance on alcohol, anyways? Nevermind that, it's do or die now for him. He just hopes he doesn't ask anything private or they will see a human combust. He can already feel his cheeks burn even when he's not touching them.

"Finally! Let's get down to business." Koutarou says excitedly. Keiji wipes his sweaty hands on his pants above his knees, pretending to stretch his arms.

"Does the person you wanna kiss know that you like them?"

He holds his glass, but hesitates to drink.

"1, 2…"

"3, 4…"

"5."

"That's sad, Keiji!!"

Tetsurou sighs as if Keiji just wasted something. "Try again next time, Bo!" He says that, but he looks at Keiji's dejected face.

Kei only laughs. "I didn't know you could make such a face, Akaashi-san."

"While it hurts that the person I like doesn't like me back, it's more painful when your friends rub it in your face." Keiji drinks his beer, scowling.

"Well, that person will like you soon enough. I mean, you're a good person! You take care of other people, especially me!"

Only you, Bokuto-san. Not any other people. Keiji almost wants to tell it to him. Knowing the fact that Koutarou may not like him the same way, and that it would create an awkward gap between them restricts him from doing so.

They go on for a few more rounds. Until everything dies down and everyone needs to go home. Four of them are left drunk. Earlier, Keiji is confident that he will only be left tipsy, but now Koutarou looks at him as he slurs his speech.

"How did you even manage to make Kuroo drink a lot…?" Kenma asks, with a hint of annoyance towards the tall man that's leaning on his shoulders.

"He takes it from you, Kenma! He doesn't like to lose!" Koutarou teases.

"Well, I'm gonna take Tsukki to his apartment now. I had so much fun with you guys!" Tadashi tells them and bids farewell as he carries his own struggle that was Kei.

"Okay, stay safe! You go home now, too, Kageyama!" Shouyou playfully kicks Tobio's butt, probably drunk that it's making him hyper.

"Who says you can order me around?"

"What are you even gonna do here? Watch the lovebugs flirt?"

Koutarou frowns at what he hears. Lovebugs, huh? Who else is still even with them on the rooftop? Tetsurou and Kenma just left, and these Karasuno alumni are the only ones here besides them.

"You, me. At the kitchen. Now." Tobio's probably drunk, too. And with a final banter, only the two of them remain in their seats.

The place is a mess. But they can always clean it up tomorrow. First things first, he needs to get Keiji home. How can he, though, when he's sleeping soundly at the low table, some chips sticking on his cheeks and his hair and glasses unkempt? Koutarou chuckles at the scene. Not the usual Keiji that he sees when he eats dinner with him after finishing his office work. Not the usual Keiji that will let his guard completely down at almost any circumstances. Not the usual Keiji that is composed, and continuously suppressing his emotions.

The athlete reaches for Keiji's head and strokes a stray hair in place. He removes the chips from his cheeks and takes off his glasses. It startles him that he startles Keiji from sleeping.

"Oh, sorry, I was just…"

Keiji groans, disoriented. He moves up from the table, says something absolutely incoherent, and lies down on the cold, concrete floor. Koutarou wants to laugh so bad. But instead he sits on the ground and lets Keiji use his legs as pillows.

"Ahh, how long was I asleep?" Keiji whispers, covering his eyes with his arm. Finally, something that he can understand.

"For about thirty minutes or so."

"Why are you letting me use your thighs?" Keiji wants to run away, but he's tired to even stand.

"Why not?"

That leaves them silent. The night sky is pretty clear when it's 1AM. They watch the stars twinkle in the cold December.

"Are you sober now, Akaashi?"

"A little bit."

"Aw, that's a bummer. They told me people are more straightforward and honest when they're drunk."

"Were you going to ask a question?"

"Yeah."

"Well, you can still ask. If I'm half-sober, then I'm still half-drunk. So you might still get an honest answer. Just half-honest though."

Bokuto giggles. "What are you thinking right now?"

Akaashi hums. "I'm thinking about you and your thighs."

"Wow, I guess you're still like, 75% drunk."

"Yeah…"

A moment of peace again. But then Koutarou seems to have something in mind still.

"If a drunk person told you right now that they like you, would you believe it? Or would you treat it as something a drunk person would say?"

All thought processes have stopped and he is suddenly sober. Keiji sits up to face him but Koutarou catches his shoulders and gets him to lay on his back again. No turning back, Keiji guesses. There's this brewing panic inside his chest, and there's also expectancy. He mulls over about what to answer.

After a few minutes, he speaks.

"I'd believe it if it were you."

Keiji isn't a reckless person. He's meticulous, cautious and prepared. Always. He never wants anything to go wrong. He tries to hold it all in as long as he's able. But maybe that's why he's been pining for his friend for years. Why he's so frustrated with everything Koutarou. Why he just wants to let go of everything he's been locking in.

He regrets his answer for a second, but after a while, he becomes satisfied. It's like an overflowing dam. But this dam is quiet and gentle.

"Bokuto-san, I–"

He's cut off by Koutarou's abrupt gesture, holding his squished cheeks and forcing him to look at the man. Koutarou hovers over him as he blocks the stars with his spiky hair. To be fair, he is Keiji's own little, personal little star, that even if it's dark at where they are, Koutarou's personality radiates and warms Keiji's freezing hands.

"Remember the time I went to your college graduation? I was earlier to arrive than the others because I wanted to tell you something."

Keiji made a low sound of affirmation.

"Konoha and Washio suddenly arrived, and lost the chance to tell you. It was already hard to keep in touch when you were studying, it was harder when I went pro."

He strokes the raven-haired’s face with his thumb in the most minimal, careful way.

"But it never changed. You never changed. Well, you did, but in the best way possible. I'm just so happy that you put so much effort in staying by my side."

"While I'm trying my best to make you feel that way too, sometimes I really lack in that department. You never made me feel bad about it, though. Sometimes it was annoying that you weren't angry or something."

"Now, I'm really sure. But I still don't know what you feel, so…"

"You’re so silly, Bokuto-san." It's suddenly a chore to speak. “But I don't want to make any assumptions. Can you tell me precisely? How do you feel about me?"

"Can I show it to you instead?" His face closing in the gap, his voice almost pleading.

Keiji holds the man's face. "Okay."

As he shuts his eyes close, a tear escapes. Koutarou's lips are warm against his chapped pair. It's almost making him feel embarrassed. But as their kiss deepens, everything is unexpectedly light and full and just… there in the moment. Time freezes. But cars continue to move. Their minds are empty. But heartbeats are loud, echoing.

"I love you, Keiji. Happy birthday."

This day isn't so bad after all.

* * *

**EXTRA**

_  
_ "So you were pertaining to him when you wanted to kiss someone. And the person who doesn’t know that you like them!” Tenma exclaims, borderline making fun of his own editor. It’s just so funny to him that they’ve fallen in love with each other these past years and they only learned about it recently. 

“Why are you even in my apartment, Udai-san…?” Keiji asks his mangaka after pausing from his work. Tenma sprawls on the carpet, comfortable with his getup, a thick jacket over his sweatpants. 

“I told you, my heater broke, it’s so cold and I don’t know where else to stay! Plus, I’m friends with your boyfriend now. We’re going to eat lots and play Mario Kart all night.” The word boyfriend particularly echoes in his ears and it stays there.

“It’s a weekend, Udai-san. It’s  _my_ weekend. With my boyfriend.” Yeah, it feels foreign to the tongue as well. It makes his stomach churn with delight, and the back of his head tingly. His cheeks almost want to smile.

“Okay, okay. Sheesh. Then I’ll give you another weekend in exchange for the accommodations.”

“Don’t bluff. I won’t move your deadline.”

“You will be the death of me, Akaashi-san… Bokuto-san…” he cries, “please tell Akaashi to have mercy…”

Koutarou comes back to the living room to place a tray of dinner food on the small table. Pork cutlets for the three of them, miso soup and some side dishes. “You know Sensei, when we were younger, Keiji wouldn’t have mercy on me too. He would pick on my mistakes and criticize me.”

“So…?”

“You can handle it, Sensei. I’m rooting for you!” Tenma groans in frustration as he tumbles on the carpet while Keiji chuckles at the sudden turn. They thought he was going to say something encouraging.

Koutarou sits beside him as Tenma starts to eat ahead. “You shouldn’t be working tonight… Even though Sensei’s here, you’re not obligated to work on a weekend, right?”

“Yeah but, well, I just wanted to reduce the load of work I have for the following week.”

“But you’re supposed to spend time with me.” He whispers, his pout tugging Keiji’s heartstrings. 

“Okay, I’m sorry.” The editor cups Koutarou’s face and gives him a peck on the lips. “Let’s spend the night together.”

“Okay.”

“Sappy,” Tenma comments as he slurps on his bowl of soup. Both of them glares at him, as if telling him to get out. “Okay, okay! Zipping my mouth.”

The couple chuckles softly to each other, and everything else seems nothing compared to this happiness contained in a safe corner. They wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm @juraemi_ on twt! let's scream about bkak together!


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